| LIFESTYLE | Build a Better Woman

Some of us are still really close with our homegirls from grade school. Some of us still spend time with friends we've had since high school, and the really lucky ones are still meeting up with college girlfriends whenever there is free time. Girl world is all about exclusivity and integration, grey area and making acquaintances, while still not fully trusting-that-bitch but being open because she could really be a pivotal person in your life. There is a thin line between friend and frenemy when it comes to us women, but when did the line get this way?

 I understand women have been programmed to compete with each other, we heard the beautiful Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie tell us that society (including our moms, aunts, and sisters) train us to compete with each other "for the attention of men". One thing I love about #BlackTwitter is the awareness women are raising about the double standards between women cheating and being cheated on, women being confident vs being a bitch, and how important it is for us to support each other and hold each other accountable.

WHY is it so hard for women to genuinely want the absolute best for other women? Even the most friendly socialite still has a side eye stashed for the next diva that may be getting ready to walk through the room, but where does it come from?  Who taught us? Living in Los Angeles I see millions of women, all of us looking for our version of "success" in a city where you literally don't need to 'grow up' to be a 'grown up'. We learn to navigate between living at the center of our world with the other 1.9 million women living at the center of theirs, and then go out and try to make that shit work. But yet despite that we're all searching for the "right" way, we judge other women based on their relationship decisions, looks, and nowadays job occupations.

"Oh, she's good, she's in law school".

"Oh she's weak, she works at Target"

Im wondering how the hell are we 1) supposed to learn from anyone if we expect them to be exactly like us 2) STILL thinking that our value comes from this imaginary prestige passed down like fables at some camp story time?

Now privilege DOES exist, and in no way do I think prejudice doesn't happen, but who's making these rules? The whole European/ American witch trial movement in the 1600's was created to suppress women that had the ability to heal and bring people together, calling them devils and burning them alive (if you haven't looked it up don't debate me). These were actual women that were in these streets, making a difference! And lets not forget the whole women's suffrage movement, I mean we dictate what's hot and what's not as it is, why not come together to create MORE of what we want?

Women are magic, we give and take life away, we bring assets to each other that help nourish communities, inspire nations,  and most importantly dictate the next social media movement! Cardi B v Beyonce, Amber Rose and Zoe Saldana (who are ALL my girls in one way or the other).. we're here to inspire the next woman to do what they want by accomplishing exactly what WE want! Maybe just by smizing your next resting bitch face, or saying hello FIRST... Give another woman the power to be her best self, and watch a nation rise. Sounds preachy, but the universe is out here for us, let's love it because love is the worship of our higher selves; we deserve to give it as much as we deserve to receive it. "Even though we're doing it on our own, it's good to know we're all doing it together"*

*#BossBabeQuote